Midnight Meltdowns

My son absolutely lost it last night when I dared to get out of bed and leave the room. Pillows went flying, bedding was stripped, lots of crying and screaming!

“Mommy, you taking so long! Mommy come here!” all this mixed in with the stomping and pacing! Not a good night for my son with SPD.

I got back into bed next to him, ensuring a big enough space between us, so as to not get in “his space”, but close enough for him to know that I’m there.

Then after a few minutes, I felt the weight of his left arm over my shoulder, an embrace I’ve missed for such a very long time. With my eyes closed and a big smile of contentment on my face, I was so tempted to take his left hand into mine, but I knew that I dared not move!

I kept as still as humanely possible, hoping that my breathing would not disturb. I wanted to hold on to this moment for as long as he would allow me to. “Mommy, I’m here, when you peel away all the layers, then you will still find the boy you once knew. Mommy I love you” said the weight of his arm as I soaked up the moment.

About twenty minutes later his small body turned away from me, allowing him his special space, and he whispered in his sleep, “rub my back”.