Your firm handshake as you wish me all god’s richest blessings on my birthday was missed today. Dad, an emptiness marked the absence of your words this morning as I stared into my cup.
Birthday wishes that were always lost on me. An unnecessary and awkward interaction. One that both you and mom know I didn’t quite like, but still you wished. No fancy gifts, only words spoken from the heart.
This morning Kai sparked.
He gave me a massive box of chocolates with only one chocolate left inside. A zesty tasting chocolate that he’d been storing since last week. This precious kid, never a dull moment with him – but you already know this.
Mom reminded me of your absence when she sent me a birthday message. Her understanding of me growing a bit more as I recognise the subtle steps she’s taken to make my mornings less invasive. It is difficult to adjust to no longer having that barrier – you, between our vastly different worlds.
My plan was to work from home on my birthday and spend some good quality time Kai and mom, but unfortunately the needs at the office dictated otherwise. The silver lining? Two delicately delicious slices of carrot cake.
Now, don’t fall off your chair – each slice set me back a whopping R44! Fucking insane (excuse the language), but so worth it! I mean, it is my birthday afterall, right? Stuffing our faces with carrot cake and pizza, the perfect end to an ordinary day with our extraordinary family.
Special in our unique little way as we continue to remember you all day.
oh no – I cannot believe I had no idea that Monday was your birthday!!! I owe you a huge drink very soon to celebrate the year ahead xxxx
Haha – you know we don’t need a birthday to have a drink 😉
Happy blessed Birthday,
May the light moved in you.
Thank you Courage.